There are times during our journey as Christians, where we may find ourselves in a familiar place. A sense of déjà vu overcomes us as we take in the familiarity of a lesson once previously given. I imagine Jesus holding our hand tightly as we attempt to pull away and forget our past, as though He is motioning, “Not yet”. Not that He wants to instill feelings of regret, guilt, condemnation or sorrow within us as we prefer to just forget, but to point us back to Him and the healing He is bringing to completion. He will request we take a trip down memory lane not to look at us and our misdeeds, but to seek for Him and His faithfulness. This trip may appear as a refresher course of fundamental lessons that life, and our will, has a way of causing us to forget.

While we were in the mess, we could not look past our own faults and shame, but as we understand it backwards, we can see where Jesus saved us, covered us in mercy, protected us in grace and showered us with love, forgiveness and redemption. Life has a way of leading us down Forgetful Avenue when we should remain on Remember Lane. Many times, on Forgetful Avenue I will find myself making the same wrong turns and then wonder in frustration why I am not at my destination. I will take the wheel from Jesus, thinking I know a better way or shortcut. After driving in circles and then wanting to just drive off a cliff in frustration, I usually surrender the wheel back to Jesus. Then He will have to take us back through familiar neighborhoods of pain and over bumpy roads of heartbreak, to get me out of the mess I have made within myself and my life around me, but He never abandons me.

What am I trying to say? There are lessons Jesus will bring to us repeatedly, whether because we have not gotten it yet or He wants to remind us that even in our time of feeling lost and confused, He was there (and will continue to be there) to lead us out, so long as we are willing to surrender and follow Him. Very recently, Jesus brought me back to my first encounter with Him through a series of events that led to me forgetting a pivotal moment in my life with Him.

I remember when I first accepted Jesus as Savior, I was participating in a three-part program for trauma and identity. After hours of scaling past trauma and hurt and emotional rawness, I was able to hear the Spirit of God more clearly than ever before. I was able to recognize His voice as He told me His first promise to me of His reckless pursuit of me: “As you have been desiring for a man to love and pursue you, you have been blinded to Me loving and pursuing you all this time.” It was the most beautiful promise and revelation I have ever heard. And now, nearly thirteen years later, He has wooed me into that same reminder.

Life has a way of having an art for drifting. We will forget significant moments in our lives and even miracles God perform as they get lost in the mundane. Elements of our own will never come to a head or finishing look not being as we imagined like our dreams, hopes and plans, causing us to fall into a pit of hopelessness and despair. Like Peter after Jesus died and was buried, I would imagine that his image and hope for a redeeming Savior was buried with Jesus as they put him in the tomb. Hopelessness sunk into him and he returned to the life he knew before Christ, a fisherman. How quickly do we resort back to old patterns and lifestyle habits after we are met with disappointment? Peter forget all the miraculous acts Jesus performed, Peter forget that he recognized Him as the Son of God and most importantly, he forgot that Jesus told them He would rise again.

Jesus’s first encounter with Peter after His resurrection was similar to His initial encounter with him (Matthew 4:18-22, John 21:1-7) Peter was fishing and not having much luck with catching anything until a voice from the shore told him where to cast his net and they were able to catch an overload of fish. However, this time, there was a reference point as He was reliving a memory, the memory of when he first met Jesus. With joy, Peter jumped into the sea and swam towards Jesus (John 21:7). Jesus knew that the only way Peter would be identify Him would be to take him down memory lane to a very personable and intimate moment. The first moment where Peter was in darkness and presented with Life. I really do love this story because it reminds me that Jesus doesn’t forget, not to bring us sorrow, but to bring us hope. He doesn’t forget so He doesn’t want us to forget either. It reminds me how Jesus comes looking for us as He went looking for Peter, because He wants more intimate moments with us that will continuously transform our lives. Jesus meeting with Peter in His resurrection led to the resurrection of Peter’s faith which I believe was a pivotal point in him continuing Jesus’s ministry.

I pray that whatever it is you are battling or struggling with, you remember the goodness and faithfulness of Jesus. That you recall the moment where He first met you in the darkness and showed you the light. That intimate encounter where you first heard the voice of the Savior and the sweet promises He told you and is faithful to fulfill in completion (Hebrews 10:23). I pray that the life that may have drifted you does not keep you, but at the sound of Father’s voice you jump out of that boat and move towards the Savior who has been there with you since the beginning.